Does Abuse Stem from the Church?

I received a comment on here from someone whom I think is wonderful and worthy of this being posted, as she brought up an interesting point of view, one I really haven’t given much thought to, as far as writing about it anyway. I want to share her thoughts and my reply as I know she is absolutely correct in the thinking of what divides family and, “church,” along with the abusive nature of it. My reply indicates the very beginning of how this all came to be. Judge for yourself…

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Abigail,
I keep thinking there is hope. Surely, if dv murders have decreased since the 1970's we can also find a way to decrease all of dv, and eventually stop it.

I am convinced that if Christians could be convinced that husband authority is non-scriptural and wrong, that the pressure from Christians to keep women down would not only lift, it would change into helping women up.

To try to make a difference, I wrote a novel "Behind the Hedge," that shows the more subtle forms of abuse in action. On July 24 I am to speak at the Seneca Falls 2 conference in Orlando FL, which is aimed at finding solutions to be effective at stopping gender-inequality in the Christian community. see www.senecafalls2.com

I have no idea where you stand religiously. But I do have a request. The Christians I am trying to convince will never reach out to non-conservative Christians or secular people, yet the conservative Christians are a fairly large group who would be a force to be reckoned with if we could convince them that women are equal and to be treated well. I am asking people of a non-Christian background to consider educating themselves as to the scriptural beliefs of the Christian right regarding gender roles.

I, myself, was of that group at one time, and folks who just dismissed what I believed, or who acted as if they knew what I believed better than I did were such a turn-off and so unhelpful. I think if folks who are not of the Christian right make an effort to befriend women who are imprisoned by the domineering Christian right, that we can better help them get free. As more women of that group are respectfully taught (a thimbleful at a time) what those scriptural passages that they think imprison them actually say/mean, I think we can make huge strides against dv.

When a friend (from the conservative right) of mine was in college, she found out that views that she had, or some variation of them, were also in society. And that is especially so in the devaluing of women. When I facilitated the men's group for the batterers education program, I found that many secular men had the same beliefs that christian men do regarding women. I get the impression that the growing teaching of husband authority in conservative Christian groups is influencing society and greatly contributes to causing domestic violence to increase.

If you want to educate yourself as I suggested, try my blog, http://submissiontyranny.blogspot.com, and check out the blogs on my blog-roll.

Thanks for "listening!"

~Waneta Dawn, author of "Behind the Hedge" see www.wanetadawn.com

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Dear Waneta,

This is such an interesting topic for me as my beliefs are so much different than others. Yes, I am of a spiritual being- no label attached as to whether Christian, Baptist, Catholic, etc… Organized faith and religion is completely out of the question for me. I see too much bureaucracy and hypocrisy within these structures- thus to me, this is a huge downfall of the world’s population- holy wars…

Yes, I was raised up in a, “Christian” home, with “The First Church of Christ” being our meeting place about four times a week- I even graduated from a “Christian” high school. However, religion was beaten into me via my grandmother, (my grandparents raised me.) Maybe this is the reason why I shun organized faith and sought to find another way back to God.

This I have accomplished. Our bodies are the temples of God and I have sought “His” council and guidance through my spiritual connection to “Him.” Men and women are of equal worth before God, since both are created in God's image. I believe God is not gender based- the male and female qualities, as we know them, are part of what God’s make up is. Our souls are just a spark of this phenomenal entity.

When it comes to the Bible- I believe a lot of the basic teachings and lessons are true, however, there have been many, upon many translations throughout the years. I believe there has been a gender based biasness as to whom the dominate figures were- man… Awhile back, I had either watched, or read something about how there were many books of the Biblical testaments that were written by women, but were left out of the Bible. Man didn’t want the world to know that they were equal in the creation of it. They even left a lot of Mary, (Jesus’ mother,) out other than her giving birth to Him and when He was crucified. The translators thought this was of equal basis just with the mentions. Books such as Ruth and Ester- this was also for an equality measure, however, these books were written by men. I also have seen contradiction within the pages. One example, “thou shalt not kill.” Then further on after the 10 commandments were established, there was still war- killing of each other and nations.

God is of light, love and positive energy. Any act of pain, suffering and darkness is due to evil and sin. That is the other entity that sways even those who deem themselves worthy and good- with a structured and organized label.

Thank you for your comment on my blog. Yes, I agree with you about these religious based beliefs. If we could get a lot of this out of the, “churches,” maybe society would have a better chance at survival.

Blessings,
-Abby

I would love to get a discussion going on this. Please feel free to leave a comment.