Sunday, July 11, 2010
Life Behind the Razor Blade- Part Two- By Jamiey Smith
It’s been four years.. Four years since, (or at least it’s felt like that long,) I last saw HIM. Four years of no talking to him- hah! I will be a sophomore in high school now. Seriously… Who ever said that High School is the last best four years of your school life is a serious idiot.. Because my 9th grade year was holy living crap!
On the first day of high school, I had friend’s, a smile on my face, and a NEW best guy friend. His name was Adam. He was everything I ever wanted in a guy friend, cute, smart, funny, sweet etc, etc…
I breathed in fresh air when I stepped off the bus. “Welcome to High School”, is what went through my mind. I adjusted my ancient backpack on my shoulder and walked my way to my homeroom. I sighed wearily and searched the front of the campus for my friends. “No sign of them,” I mumbled under my breath. Good that was just what I had wanted. I started to take a few steps then I came right to a halt.
My breath caught in my throat and I couldn’t breath. The one person I dreaded to see… “Stephen,” I said quietly to myself, my eyes filled with unimaginable hurt. All the things he had put me through flashed through my mind in a millisecond. There he was, standing with a few of the girls I knew from 7th grade.
He looked at me, and I could tell he was surprised. I looked away as I felt electricity spark between him and I. I knew he could feel it too, because I noticed his form cringed. All I wanted to do was run into his arms, beg him to take me back- I still loved him that much, until a person blocked my view. “JAMIEY!” She threw herself on me with a big hug, It was Heather. I snapped from my daze and looked at her.
“Hi H-Heather” I said softly and glanced at Stephen as she took my arm and led me away, yet, she didn’t know about him. I didn’t bother to tell her. I mean she was like my sister, but I didn’t care to tell her the one secret only a few people know. It wasn’t any of her business until she saw me looking at him “Oh? Whose the boy, hmm?” I averted my gaze and sighed. “He’s just someone who I know. He’s my brother’s friend,” I said while linking my arm through hers, walking with her to her homeroom and I said my good byes. I set search for the one person I longed to get in contact with, Stephen.
I walked casually up to the group of students where Steven was and they all recognized me immediately. “JAMIEY!!” Mary and Darien said unison, I smiled weakly, (which I was still working on with trying to form it,) and turned towards Stephen, my eyes filled with regret and hurt. “H-Hi S-Stephen,” I said with a bit of a stutter.
I was shaking. If I wasn’t wearing my famous trademark-black pants- anyone would of seen myself shaking. I tried to control my hands the best I could, and by that, I mean, stick them in my jacket pockets.
It was one of our hot and humid mornings and I wore the jacket because I had cuts on my arms. I can tell you one thing, I was beginning to sweat and I wanted to take it off, but I couldn’t. I cursed silently to myself for cutting my wrists and arms the night before. So there were still angry red marks visible. Though my cover up make up wasn’t working, it was melting off.
“Jamiey,” his raspy voice sounded through my ears and I almost cringed. “How have you…been?” he asked me as I looked into those midnight black irises.
“I…I don’t know actually. It’s been a long two years Stephen.”
He smiled that sickly sweet smile. “Too long puppet, too long,” he whispered.
That alone made me shiver. I looked around and Darien and Mary were no where to be seen. Kimmy and Courtney left to go say hi to Dallas and Harley. “Uh.. I should go,” I said quickly and began to walk away from him. He grabbed my arm, the ones with the cuts. I winced with pain. He took note of my reaction and he also took note about how they started to bleed through the material, forming small dark spots. Slowly he lifted my sleeve back. “You still cut?” he asked. I nodded. “For how long?” I didn’t answer for a moment and turned my face away from him. “Two years,” I said softly. He pulled me into a hug. I gasped, remembering how he smelled. I hugged him back, holding onto him for he felt like my life line.
Part Three is in the works...